Escape to Paradise: Hotel Alpina Obertauern Awaits!
Escape to Paradise, or Just a Jolly Good Holiday? My Alpina Obertauern Review - The Raw & Real Edition!
Okay, buckle up, because I just got back from a stay at the Hotel Alpina Obertauern, and let me tell you, trying to condense my experience into a neat little review is like trying to herd cats with a feather duster. Still, here goes… and trust me, it’s gonna be honest.
First things first: Accessibility. This is a biggie for some, and a question mark for me. I'm not using a wheelchair, so I can't give a comprehensive assessment. The hotel does advertise Facilities for disabled guests, but specific details are… ahem… a little elusive from my research. So, important to inquire by directly contacting them to get the full scope. They do have an elevator, always a plus. So, check their webpage and ask some direct questions.
Cleanliness and Safety – A Breath of Fresh Air (Literally, Maybe?)
Okay, let's talk COVID, because let's face it, that's the elephant in the room (or, you know, EVERY room). They took it seriously, which was a relief. Hand sanitizer was everywhere, like a welcome guest you couldn't quite get rid of. They had anti-viral cleaning products and professional-grade sanitizing services. More good! Daily disinfection in common areas, and rooms sanitized between stays. Made me feel like I could breathe (mostly… I still worried about my germs, though. We all do!). They had a sanitized kitchen and tableware, and thankfully, cashless payment service was readily available. I even saw sterilizing equipment – which just made me feel like I was in a very sophisticated, yet slightly paranoid, James Bond movie.
My Personal Quirks and Imperfections:
Before I go any further, I’m going to get something else out of the way. Not everyone considers mountain air to be good, especially if breathing feels laborious. It makes me sleepy, so, I got the chance to take a lot of naps. It's the ultimate test to relaxing, and the Alpina Obertauern passes with flying colors.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking – From Breakfast Buffets to (Potentially) Puking on the Slopes
This is where things get really interesting. Restaurants, plural! Yes! They have several, and I tried them all (for research purposes, naturally).
- Breakfast [buffet]: Okay, the breakfast buffet was the bomb. Seriously. Western breakfast, Asian breakfast - they had it ALL. And it was all DELICIOUS. They also offered breakfast takeaway service which was a godsend, especially when I was running late (which was… often). The coffee/tea in the restaurant, was, let's just say, not always on point.
- A la carte in restaurant? Yes, plenty. This is where I discovered my love of their local dishes, which tasted amazing. I think I ate more soup in restaurant than I EVER have.
- The Bar: Ah, the bar. This is where things get hazy (and occasionally, loud). Happy hour was a legit good time, and they had a poolside bar which I didn't know I wanted, but needed.
- Poolside bar: Who doesn't love a poolside bar, especially if there's a pool?
- Restaurants: Many restaurants. Not all were good, but the service was always great!
Things to Do – Skiing, Spa-ing, and Avoiding Falling Over
Okay, Obertauern is a ski resort, so… duh. Skiing is the main draw. I'm not exactly Grace Kelly on skis, but the slopes were well-maintained, and the views were stunning (when I wasn't face-planting, that is).
But let's talk about the Spa/Sauna. Oh, the spa! Or Spa! Or… whatever the right way to say it is, I spent hours there. They had it all: a sauna, a steamroom, massage… the works. I even splurged on a body scrub and a body wrap, which left me feeling like a brand new human. (Side note: if you haven’t tried a body wrap, you’re missing out. It’s like being swaddled in a warm, gooey blanket… and then someone throws in a bit of magic.)
The Swimming Pool: Okay, the swimming pool [outdoor] was… chilly. Let's just say I didn't spend too much time in it. However, the pool with view was worth every shiver.
There was also a fitness center, which I visited… once. Let's just say the spa was much more my speed.
The Rooms – Cozy, Convenient, and… Okay, Not Perfect
My room? It had a non-smoking policy because, you know, people are different. It had a double bed, bathrobes, a coffee/tea maker, and… wait for it… Air conditioning. (Thank GOD for the AC when I tried to recover from my sunburn). It was super comfortable, even if it felt a little cramped. It had great blackout curtains that were great for a good sleep.
The Internet access – wireless was there, but as with most hotels, the Wi-Fi was spotty at times. The free Wi-Fi worked, and I loved the fact that there was free bottled water and toiletries available. However, there was no extra space.
Services and Conveniences – The Little Things That Make a Trip
- Concierge: They can arrange pretty much anything, from airport transfer to car park [free of charge]. They were also incredibly helpful with finding restaurants and giving advice.
- Daily housekeeping: They kept it pretty darn clean!
- Luggage storage: Crucial for a disorganized traveler like me.
- Dry cleaning and laundry service: Helpful in a pinch.
- Car park [on-site]: Very convenient.
For The Kids
The hotel is generally family/child friendly.
Getting Around & Other Stuff
They had a car park [free of charge], a taxi service, and airport transfer.
The Verdict: Should YOU Escape to Paradise?
Okay, so here's the deal. The Hotel Alpina Obertauern isn't perfect. It’s got its quirks, some of its amenities may need a little more looking into, the Wi-Fi might be a bit temperamental, and getting around may be problematic for some. But, and this is a big BUT, it's a genuinely lovely place to stay. It's clean, safe, the staff are wonderful, the spa's fantastic, and the location is perfect for skiing and enjoying the beautiful scenery.
So, who should book this hotel?
- Skiers (obviously)
- Spa lovers
- People who value relaxation and comfort
- Those looking for a clean and safe getaway.
- People who can laugh off a few minor imperfections in the name of a good time
The Realest Offer - Escape to Paradise (with Realistic Expectations!)
Book your stay at Hotel Alpina Obertauern now!
- Get a special discount on all room types!
- Enjoy a complimentary welcome drink at the bar!
- Get a complimentary massage upgrade when you book a spa treatment!
- Guarantee a stress-free ski trip!
- Offer valid for stays booked before [Date] and for travel between October and May
- See what the Alpina is like by trying it
Click here to book now! [Insert link here]
This isn't just a hotel; it's an experience. It might not be perfect, but it's definitely worth escaping to. Just… remember to pack your sense of humor and be prepared to embrace the chaos! You won't regret it.
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Hotel Alpina Obertauern: A Hilariously Imperfect Austrian Adventure (or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Schnitzel)
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because you're about to embark on a journey… with me. And let me tell you, I'm not exactly known for my flawless planning. This is less "precise itinerary" and more "organized chaos loosely held together by the promise of delicious food and slightly panicked Googling." Welcome to my Austrian escapade, Hotel Alpina Obertauern edition!
Day 1: Arrival and Altitude Sickness (and Apfelstrudel!)
- Morning (ish): The flight was… meh. Endless screaming children, questionable airplane food (seriously, what is that "chicken"?), and a persistent fear that my luggage would end up in… well, anywhere but Austria. Thankfully, it landed! The transfer to Obertauern was stunning, though. Those mountains! Just… wow. My jaw actually dropped. Until it started to throb from the altitude. Seriously, I felt like I'd been punched in the head by a fluffy cloud.
- Afternoon: Checked into the Hotel Alpina. Beautiful lobby! Receptionist, bless her heart, had the patience of a saint as I mumbled through my heavily accented German (which, let's be honest, is more "accidental gibberish"). The room? Cozy! And CLEAN! Which, coming from a hotel-hopper like myself, is a HUGE win. The windows offer stunning panoramic views.
- Late Afternoon/Early Evening: First order of business: Apfelstrudel emergency! The hotel restaurant, thankfully, delivered. That flaky pastry, warm apple filling, and dollop of cream… pure, unadulterated heaven. Honestly, it cured the altitude sickness. Or maybe it was just the sheer, unadulterated happiness of consuming something that perfect. Afterwards, sat outside and inhaled crisp alpine air.
- Evening: Dinner. Started well – soup, fresh bread. Then – oh dear God – the main course. The menu called it 'Wiener Schnitzel'. I've had schnitzel before. I thought I knew schnitzel. But this… This was a revelation. The perfectly tenderized meat, the golden-brown crust… I'll never be the same. After about 3 bites I realized I had ordered enough for two people. It was worth it. Followed by a disastrous attempt at ordering Strudel again (I was not prepared to see it as a separate dish). Went early to bed.
Day 2: Skiing (or, The Art of Face-Planting Gracefully)
- Morning: Ski rental. This was a comedy of errors. Me, attempting to speak fluent ski-tech with my limited German, and the extremely patient shop assistant. Ended with skis that were probably five feet too long and boots that felt like medieval torture devices. Stumbled out onto the slopes with the optimism of a puppy chasing a bouncy ball.
- Morning (continued): The first run. Epic fail. Managed to stay upright for approximately 3.2 seconds before spectacularly face-planting into the powdery snow. My inner child, a particularly dramatic one, may have wept. But the view! The crisp air! The sheer, ridiculous joy of it all! Worth it. Spent the next few hours mostly on my backside. Eventually, learned to somewhat control the things.
- Afternoon: Lunch at a mountainside hut. Hearty goulash soup, greasy but glorious Käsespätzle (cheese noodles…the life!), and a warming mug of Glühwein (spiced mulled wine). Pure. Bliss. Witnessed a local old man who was probably over 80 absolutely sailing down the mountain. Made me feel both inadequate and inspired.
- Afternoon (continued): Managed a slightly longer run, without falling (much). Felt a surge of self-confidence! Went a little too fast and… you guessed it… another spectacular face-plant. This time, I think my ski pole might have ended up in a different postal code.
- Evening: Totally destroyed my legs from skiing. Ordered room service for the night and passed out early.
Day 3: The Spa, the Sauna, and the Utter Relaxation (Plus a Mishap!)
- Morning: Spa day! The Hotel Alpina's spa is an oasis of calm. Seriously, I think I could've fallen asleep in the aromatherapy section. Massages, sauna, the works. My aching muscles (from yesterday's skiing) sighed with relief. My soul? Recharged.
- Midday: The sauna. Or, rather, my experience in the sauna. I’ve never been in one quite so hot. There were two options: a traditional, and a panoramic one. Opted for the later to enjoy the view. Big mistake. I felt my eyeballs starting to boil. Came out looking like a lobster and promptly sought out a pool of ice-cold water to throw myself into. It was exhilarating, if a little embarrassing.
- Afternoon: More relaxation. Reading a book in front of the fireplace in the hotel lounge. Drinking hot chocolate. Contemplating the meaning of life (or, at least, the meaning of my next schnitzel).
- Evening: Dinner. This time, I tackled the Wiener Schnitzel with a newfound respect and determination. Successfully negotiated the dish this time. Enjoyed a nightcap at the hotel bar, chatting with some friendly Austrians (mostly by gesturing and laughing, but we managed).
Day 4: Farewell Obertauern (and The Secret to Perfect Dumplings!)
- Morning: One last, longing look at those glorious mountains. A final breakfast – the cheese selection was particularly tempting. Checked out of the hotel, feeling surprisingly refreshed.
- Morning (continued): Decided to take on a hike. Got lost. Wandered in circles for a bit. Almost ran into a very grumpy-looking cow. But then, I stumbled upon a hidden gem: A tiny, family-run restaurant.
- Midday: Lunch at the hidden gem. The best dumplings I have ever tasted. The secret? Apparently, it’s a family recipe passed down for generations. Tried to bribe the chef for it, but she just laughed and gave me an extra dumpling. Pure bliss.
- Afternoon: Final souvenir shopping. Bought a ridiculously oversized cuckoo clock (what was I thinking?). Packed away all my Austrian memories.
- Evening: The journey home. A bittersweet goodbye to Obertauern. My legs still hurt a bit from all the skiing, my wallet is a bit lighter thanks to the cuckoo clock, and my taste buds are forever changed by the schnitzel and the dumplings.
- Late Evening: Currently writing this from my plane seat. I'm already plotting my return. Next time, though, I'm definitely taking a full-body cast for the ski chairlift. And maybe learn the language.
Random Observations/Ramblings:
- Austrians are remarkably polite, even when you’re butchering their language.
- The air smells like… mountains. And pine trees. And sometimes, faintly, of delicious cheese.
- Don’t underestimate the power of a good Apfelstrudel. Or a great schnitzel.
- Seriously, those dumplings were divine. I may have dreamt about them last night.
- I think I’m in love with Austria.
- I need a nap.
This is it, the end of my Austrian adventure! Despite the minor disasters and the moments of utter clumsiness, it was perfect. And I wouldn’t have traded a single face-plant (or dumpling!) for a more polished experience. Maybe next time I should hire a tour guide. Or not. Maybe next time, I'll just keep it messy, keep it real, and keep enjoying every single glorious, imperfect moment. Goodbye, Obertauern! Until next time, you beautiful beast!
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Escape to Paradise: Hotel Alpina Obertauern Awaits! ... or Does It? A Messy FAQ
Okay, so... Obertauern. Is it *really* paradise? Considering the driving?
Ugh, the drive. Let's be honest, the drive *to* Obertauern is a whole *thing*. It's not exactly cruising along a sun-drenched coastal highway, is it? Picture this: you're winding your way up, up, up, the car's groaning, your stomach's doing acrobatics, and you're starting to wonder if you should've just stayed home and binged Netflix. My satnav, bless its heart, kept shouting about hairpin turns. Hairpin turns! Listen, I'm a city dweller, not a rally driver. The first time, I swear I clutched the steering wheel so hard my knuckles turned white.
But! Then, you break through the final bend, and there it is. The view... it's breathtaking. So, paradise? Maybe not *entirely*. But the view from the top *might* just be worth the nausea. And if you're lucky enough to not have the terrible parking spots at the base of the resort.
The Hotel Alpina - cozy or claustrophobic? Spill the beans!
Right, the Alpina. Okay, alright, here’s the unfiltered truth. It's… complicated. The lobby is super welcoming. Fireplace, smell of pine, *immediately* feel like you're living in a Hallmark movie. Lovely! Rooms themselves? Well... it depends. Some are HUGE. Some, well, let's just say you get *very* acquainted with your roommate. Remember that time I went? My room overlooked the slopes, which was AMAZING. But it was *also* right above the outdoor bar, which meant, uh, loud apres-ski revelry. Which could be great... if you *like* not sleeping.
My friend Sarah snagged a room so tiny she could touch both walls at once. I'm not kidding! She called it her 'cozy little shoebox'. She also complained about the closet space, but hey, priorities, right? The important thing to take from this is: ask for a room with a view *and* a quiet corner, if at all possible. And maybe pack earplugs. Just in case. Just a thought.
Skiing... Beginner Friendly At All? I'm more of a "falling over gracefully" kind of person.
Obertauern's pretty good for beginners, honestly. They've got those glorious bunny slopes, the magic carpets (which, let's be real, are a Godsend), and plenty of lessons available. I, personally, am also a "falling over gracefully" enthusiast. I've got the moves down... the *falling* moves, anyway.
One time, I was on the bunny slope, feeling *brave* (read: mildly tipsy from the Glühwein). I decided to attempt a turn...big mistake. I ended up face-planting directly in front of this group of seasoned skiers. Mortifying! But, you know what? They helped me up, laughed along with me, and after that, I was able to make some progress. So there's a good environment for improving for the novice.
Let's talk about the food! Is it all just sausages and schnitzel? (And is that a bad thing?)
Okay, food. This is IMPORTANT. Yes, there's a healthy dose of sausages and schnitzel. (And no, that's *not* necessarily a bad thing!) The breakfast buffet at the Alpina is a *thing of beauty*. Endless choices: cereal, fruit, pastries, those adorable mini-quiches... and, of course, bacon. A LOT of bacon. I am not ashamed to admit I went back for seconds... and thirds. Maybe fourths.
Lunch on the slopes? Expect hearty, filling fare. Think hearty soups, delicious dumplings. The quality varies, but mostly it’s great. I had a truly *amazing* goulash soup at one of the huts, and now I dream about it regularly. However... let me confess something: on my last trip, I spent a bit too much time enjoying the apres-ski drinks, and one night I ordered a pizza that, well, let's just say it was an experience. I won't go into details, but it involved a lot of cheese and a vague suspicion of being slightly undercooked. So, yeah, food's definitely a mixed bag, but more good than bad, in my very humble opinion! Embrace the carb load, you'll burn it off on the slopes (hopefully!).
What about the apres-ski scene? Is it as legendary as everyone says? Is it... wild?
Apres-ski! Oh, yes. It’s legendary, alright. And, yes, it can get *wild*. Think dancing on tables, questionable dance moves, excessive singing… you get the picture. It's basically a joyous, slightly chaotic free-for-all. The bars spill out onto the slopes, the music is pumping, and everyone seems to be in the best mood.
One night, I witnessed a full-blown conga line snake its way through the bar. And, you've GOT to try the Jagermeister shots. Just… pace yourself. Seriously. I may or may not have woken up the next morning with a vague memory of singing karaoke (badly). And a splitting headache. But hey, it’s all part of the experience, right? So, yeah, legendary... but beware the morning after. Bring sunglasses, and maybe some aspirin.
So, what's the *best* part of staying at the Alpina? Be honest!
This is tough, because there were many things. The breathtaking scenery is certainly up there. Waking up and peeking through the curtains and seeing the sun glinting off the snow is pure magic. Really truly magical. The convenience of ski-in/ski-out access is a game-changer, no more lugging your equipment long distances.
But, I think, the *best* part? I'd have to say, it was the staff. They were so incredibly warm, friendly, and helpful. From the front desk to the lift attendant, they were always smiling and eager to help. I actually had a bit of a crisis one day (don't ask), and the staff were incredibly understanding and went above and beyond to assist me. Made me feel like a valued guest, not just a number. That kind of service… it really makes a difference. So, yeah, the people. They were part of what made the trip memorable, even with all the messy bits!
And the *worst* part? Is there a downside? Spill the beans(of disappointment)!
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